Tonight's WWE Smackdown comes to us live from the Hampton Coliseum in Hampton, VA as Josh Matthews and Matt Striker welcome us to the show. Striker hypes up the Elimination Chamber and Championship Scramble Qualifying Matches for tonight, but is quickly interrupted by Alberto Del Rio, with Ricardo Rodriguez in tow.
Del Rio gets on the mic, still fuming about last week's sneak attack by Sheamus and demands an explanation. Del Rio grabs a steel chair and refuses to leave the ring until he gets an answer. Sheamus hits the ramp and tells Del Rio that the reason is simple, Del Rio is a tremendous arse and The Great White has no use for tremendous arses. Del Rio starts up the ramp toward Sheamus, but Teddy Long hurries out with a line of security and tells them that this will not stand.
Long tells both men that as much as he realizes they want nothing more than to tear each other apart tonight, that’s not gonna happen as both of them have opponents tonight. Teddy tells Sheamus that he’s the main event tonight and orders him backstage. Long tells Del Rio to march back up to the ring because his match is next against The Moscow Menace--VLADIMIR KOZLOV. The former Sambo champion storms to ringside as we go to our first break.
ALBERTO DEL RIO def. VLADIMIR KOZLOV
A Solid ten minute opening contest. Kozlov dominated early with a flurry of Sambo throws and body blows before knocking Del Rio into another lifetime with the Battering Ram Headbutt. Del Rio is OBVIOUSLY off his game on the heels of last week and rolls to the outside to refocus. Finish comes as Kozlov makes the one mistake of attempting to trap Del Rio’s arms for another series of headbutts. Del Rio astutely capitalizes and rolls into the devastating Cross Armbreaker for the submission victory.
After the match, Del Rio celebrates in the ring as Sheamus looks on from backstage, clearly unimpressed.
We go backstage and Lance Storm is lacing up for his Championship Scramble Match as we head to break.
Back from break and we get the Smack of the Night in the recap of A.J. Styles and Mr. Anderson qualifying for the Championship Scramble last week.
Back in the ring with Lance Storm waiting for his Qualifying Match opponent. The lights go down and turn to pink and black as guitars wail through the arena signaling the debut of the final member of the Hart Family to escape the Dungeon, TEDDY HART.
TEDDY HART def. LANCE STORM to qualify for the CHAMPIONSHIP SCRAMBLE
Outstanding match. Fifteen minutes of near fall after near fall with the crowd on the edge of their seats. More “THIS IS AWESOME” chants. Finish came as Teddy Hart countered a Canadian Maple Leaf attempt and rebounded with a Hart Rate. Teddy followed up with a GORGEOUS Triple Bypass for the win. Teddy Hart now joins A.J. Styles and Mr. Anderson in the Championship Scramble.
We go backstage and Teddy Long is headed back to his office, only to be cut off at the pass by the Self-Professed “Intellectual Savior of the Masses”, Damien Sandow. Sandow expresses his displeasure with being excluded from BOTH the United States Championship Scramble picture and from any qualifying matches leading to the Elimination Chamber Match for the WWE Championship. Long informs Sandow that matches of that magnitude require a proving ground, and that Sandow has backed out of every contest he’s been offered. Sandow tells Long that he refuses to lower himself to the level of the plebeians that have been placed in front of him to this point. Teddy tells him that he better find it in himself to compete tonight, because if he tries to back out tonight, he’ll fire him on the spot. Sandow sneers as Long walks away and we go to break.
Back from break as Sandow awaits his opponent. He grabs a mic and tells the crowd that for too long they have had to sift through boring competition and he is here right now to enlighten them on proper wrestling, the likes of which they have never seen before. His promo is cut off by his debuting opponent for the evening--MONTY BROWN.
MONTY BROWN def. DAMIEN SANDOW
A hard-hitting match from the opening bell. Sandow tries to outthink the Alpha Male, but Monty Brown’s combined speed and aggression proves to much for Sandow to react. Finish comes as Sandow attempts sets up for the Straight Jacket Neckbreaker only to have it countered into the POOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUNNCE....PERIOD! from out of nowhere to give The Alpha Male the duke in his first night out.
Backstage with Kevin Kelly and John Cena. Cena tells Kevin that it doesn’t matter who stands across the ring from him tonight, NO ONE is going to keep him from moving on to the Elimination Chamber and becoming a 13-Time World Champion. STING crashes the scene and playfully slaps Cena on the cheek, simply saying “Wouldn’t count on that...” Sting locks into a staredown with Cena and tells him to bring the fight tonight before walking away. Cena looks determined as we go to commercial.
Back from break and Cena hits the ring, barreling down the entrance ramp ready for arguably the biggest match of his career and definitely his greatest challenge since Wrestlemania. The lights go down, thunder rolls and Seek and Destroy blasts from the speakers as Sting descends from the rafters as The Crow. The bell rings and here we go.
JOHN CENA def. STING to qualify for the ELIMINATION CHAMBER
Fantastic match between these two. The ever-gutsy Cena kicked out of a Scorpion Death Drop and fought valiantly to the bottom rope when locked in the Scorpion Death Lock. Sting would answer by reaching the bottom rope during an STFU and taking everything Cena threw at him and throwing it right back. Finish came as Cena captured Sting out of a Stinger Splash, ascended to the top rope with The Stinger in tow and sent him crashing to the mat with a Top-Rope FU for the cover and the three. Cena now joins Samoa Joe and Bryan Danielson inside Satan’s Structure at Extreme Rules in two weeks.
Luke Gallows is seen walking backstage in preparation for his match UP NEXT as we go to commercial.
Back from break and Gallows is in for a BIG SURPRISE as the Disco Ball descends from the rafters and the call of “LADIES AAAANNND GENTLEMEN” emanates from the PA system. Cameron and Naomi introduce the Funkasaurus and Vice Versa as BRODUS CLAY hits the entrance ramp with the Funkadactyls.
BRODUS CLAY def. LUKE GALLOWS
Physical back-and-forth contest. Gallows would attempt the Gallows’ Pole on numerous occasions, but Brodus is FAR too big to lift. Gallows tries for a Corner Splash, but Brodus dodges and comes back with a Body Avalanche of his own. Gallows staggers out of the corner and falls victim to What The Funk for the victory. After the match, Clay brings the Funkadactyls and the “Little Funkers” for a post-match celebration as we go to break.
Out of commercial and Teddy Long is back in his office. Chavo steps in as another superstar feeling slighted from the numerous vacant title pictures over the last couple weeks. Teddy explains that Chavo’s exclusion from the Cruiserweight tournament wasn’t a personal decision or a business decision, simply that Teddy had no room left in the bracket. Chavo scoffs, asking how Teddy couldn’t make room for arguably the most prominent Cruiserweight champion in WWE history. Teddy gets a wry smile on his face and tells Chavo to prove himself worthy in a match tonight, against The New F’N Show, JERRY LYNN. Chavo walks out, disgusted.
Back to the ring as The Hurricane awaits HIS opponent, The International Sensation MISTICO. The masked warrior makes a beeline for the ring and a Cruiserweight classic is moments away as the bell rings to start the contest.
MISTICO def. THE HURRICANE
Decent match with both men putting on an aerial display. Finish comes after Hurricane connects with a Shining Wizard and sets up for the Hurri-Chokeslam. Hurricane gets Mistico off the ground, but is countered mid-air into La Mistica for the submission victory. Both men get a standing ovation from the appreciative Smackdown crowd.
Jerry Lynn and Chavo Guerrero headed to the ring as we head back to break.
Back from break as Chavo Guerrero awaits the returning Jerry Lynn.
JERRY LYNN def. CHAVO GUERRERO
Solid ten minute match with constantly shifting momentum. Chavo focused on ground game as Jerry Lynn took to the air in this one. Finish came as Guerrero strayed from his strategy to attempt a Frankensteiner, only to have Lynn counter into a Cradle Piledriver for the duke.
Backstage with Sheamus prepping for the Main Event. Del Rio steps in and wishes The Celtic Warrior the best of luck and throws a signature wink his way. Sheamus tells Del Rio he doesn’t need the luck of a gigantic arse when he has the Luck of the Irish on his side, but thanks anyway, Fella. Sheamus walks off as Del Rio looks on, throws another wink and we go to break.
Back from break as Justin Roberts has the call for the main event and announces that the winner will move on to the fourth spot in the Elimination Chamber. Sheamus hits the ring first and anxiously awaits his opponent. The Indy fans in attendance erupt as Johnny Cash’s “God’s Gonna Cut You Down” fills the rafters. “The Big Rig” Brodie Lee lumbers to the ring for his Smackdown debut and the opportunity of a lifetime.
BRODIE LEE def. SHEAMUS to qualify for the ELIMINATION CHAMBER when ALBERTO DEL RIO interfered
An OUTSTANDING twenty minute main event with an unsavory finish. A VERY physical match, with countless nearfalls. Brodie demonstrated athleticism with a high Crescent Kick, and Sheamus would answer back with White Noise.
Finish comes as Brodie sets up for a Brodie Bomb, but Sheamus drops out and sets up for a Brogue Kick. Brodie evades, sending Sheamus crashing into Ricardo Rodriguez, who has jumped up on the ring apron, and rocketing him into the announce table. Del Rio moves in from the other side and jumps to the floor, dropping Sheamus left arm over the top rope. The rebound sends Sheamus wandering directly into the path of an oncoming Big Rig Boot as Brodie makes the cover and gets the three.
Completely unaware of what has transpired, Brodie helps Sheamus to his feet and shakes hands with the Great White. The Big Rig rolls down from the top rope and heads toward the back and DEL RIO pounces on Sheamus again. The Aristocrat strikes a groggy Sheamus with a Step Up Enziguri and works over Sheamus with a steel chair before sandwiching the chair on Sheamus arm and locking in the armbreaker. Ricardo Rodriguez grabs a mic and repeatedly screams “ALBERTO DEL RIO” in Sheamus face. WWE officials run to the ring to separate Del Rio from Sheamus. Security keeps victim and attacker apart as the sly Del Rio grins widely and throws a final wink as Smackdown goes off the air.
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